The Long Hallway hybrid arts event was an amazing affair and I’m glad we did it. We had a bout 60 people in our Crown Heights apartment throughout the course of the three-act show. Some came to watch Daniel Zimbler’s Edwardian short film, some came to witness Noelle’s political theater or my twisted play, and some came for the jam sesh from Ssahha. Either way, it was a social-artistic event that serves as a small testament to the art world I believe can exist. One friend said

I LOVE the way you guys said, “fuck it, we are just going to make a performance space out of what we have” it was perfect and intimate and immediate, I thought it really worked.

I’ve gotten mixed reviews about my playlet I previewed, some of which made me cry in a good way

Thanks for even just trying to say what you said… It’s not like it’s the first time this topic has been written about, but it’s the first time I was in the audience.

And some feedback made me cry in a not so good way and I’ll paraphrase,

It lacked structure and I couldn’t connect with the characters, overall it risked being melodrama.

Rehearsal for "Ordinary Affects" by Shelah Marie

Then I realized that people watch Twilight. A lot. Author Stephanie Meyer’s teenage vampire series has sold over 100 million copies worldwide (according to Wikipedia, yeah I’m a real scholar). I can’t watch it — it makes my eyes bleed and my brain swell. And then in the performance art world, there’s Ann Liv Young, who defecates and drinks her urine on stage sometimes. And a lot of people love her work. She travels all over Europe and the U.S. performing her original works – that people pay for.

Then I happened across an email by financial guru Ramit Sethi who wrote about a magazine called “Short Hair.” Please, disregard the sexist remarks for now. We can talk about that later if you’d like. Sexists are people, too. He writes,

The vast majority of men would agree with me that long hair is hotter than short hair. Yet there are women who have short hair. And although I cannot understand them whatsoever, there is a group that can: A publication called Short Hair. It’s easy to get caught up in trying to appeal to “everyone.” But the tighter your niche is, the more of that audience you will attract. For women with short hair, this is almost as tight of a niche as you can possibly create.

Why am I quoting all this?

Well, I’m mostly coaching myself out of taking any critiques personal, but I also think it’s an important to note that some people are not going to like my work (gasp!). I write in a very visceral, colloquial manner, usually about complex racial themes or dysfunctional families (surprise!). Many people want to eat nails before watching something I would write/direct. But, my work will speak to many people – and that future audience is whom I will focus on. Not saying I am going to write to please them or to attract a specific audience, but I should continue to be realistic about what kind of work I produce and how it can be categorized – and how I can use that to my advantage. Plain and simple. I’m not in the business of convincing folk to like what I do. I’m just going to be honest with myself as a person and an artist — if you’re into that shit, cool. If not, that’s cool too.

Next up is fixing up some narrative and structural issues with my play and expanding it to a one-act. Then, I want to enter it into some one-act festivals around NY and beyond. Also, stay tuned; there may be another Long Hallway in the works for late Spring. Pics and video from TLH to follow.

One final note, I also came across this article that said

The real world doesn’t reward perfectionists, it rewards people who get things done.

So go out there and get ‘er done.

Some photos from my first playlet! Read more about it here.

I’d never written what I considered to be a “play” before now. I never called myself a playwright or a writer. Hell, even after college, I still have trouble with simple syntax and grammar rules. I’d composed scenes, monologues, collections of scenes and short stories – but never anything that I would present as a play.

When I moved into my apartment this September, I fell in love with the space on many levels. An apartment full of artists, cultural diversity, great location, no hipsters, and most of all, the architecture. I don’t know much about architecture – I read over 100 pages of Fountainhead, does that count? Anyway, I’m not technically versed in building structures or anything like that, but I knew there was something very special about this space.

The columns in the dining room frame it so nicely that it almost begs to be used as a stage, the open living room asks for people to fill it, and the long, dramatic hallway is a structural incubator for secrets and stories. At least that’s the way I see it. So, within a few weeks of living there, my roommate Noelle and I decided that we would give the apartment what it wanted.  On December 10^th we are hosting an arts event appropriately titled, “The Long Hallway” at our apartment. It will consist of one short film, a live band playing some jazz-ish North African tunes, and two short plays, one of which is mine.

That’s right. I pieced together a bunch of writing I had in nameless journals and turned it into a playlet that runs about 20 minutes. It’s an intensely personal piece and I’m not sure exactly how I’m going to feel when it actually goes up in front of a bunch of people, but that’s all part of it. For me, this event is about creating the theater world I want to see. If the theater you want to see isn’t valued or perpetuated in mainstream outlets, make it yourself. It’s not a perfectly polished masterpiece, but it is an honest, well-crafted experiment in what you can do with stories, memories and people on a stage.

I hope you join me.

ordinary affects, written & directed by shelah marie

Love,

Shelah Marie

Playwright. Director. Artist.

PS. Here’s an interview we did with HER CIRCLE Magazine about the show!

PSS. Watch some rehearsal footage!

Rob Andrews / Union Square Clean

Yesterday I stood completely still in the midday heat, in Union Square, and invited strangers to wash and pray over my feet.

Why?

Why not?

I came across Rob Andrews, who was putting together a performance piece for the Art In Odd Places festival. I thought to myself, “Well, that’s disgusting.” If you know me, you know I am hardly ever barefoot even inside my own house. The only time I go without shoes is in the shower, in bed or maybe in rehearsal. Also, the thought of someone I don’t know touching my damn feet makes me itch. I also don’t sit/stand still very much at all. So, naturally I thought this would be a good thing to do.

AWESOME!

So, along with 30 or so other artists we agreed to stand still a collective 12 hours from sunup to sundown on October 8, 2002 in Union Square.

10:00am — I get off at the W4th Street Station and underestimate how lightheaded I’m going to feel by the time I get to Starbucks on 15th street where I am meeting some other collaborators. Mind you, I am carrying three large Ball Jars (two which a full of water), two sheets, a grass mat and I haven’t had coffee yet.

I get to Starbucks and take three sips of coffee, eat half a green apple, some cheese and some nuts. Then I wait 18 minutes to use the one restroom in Starbucks, until I say eff it head next door to Au Bon Pain. I doubt I want to use the bathroom after 18-minute guy anyway. God only knows…

11:10am — I’m running behind as I was supposed to be standing from 11am, but it’s 18-minute guy’s fault! I walk up to the part of Union Square that we are “occupying” (isn’t that the buzz words these days?) and I look around. The only person washing feet is Rob who fulfilled his part in the piece by washing feet from 7am to 7pm. Let that marinate.

I breathe, and set out my items. The jars full of water for washing, gauze, the mat to stand on, the instructional cards that read, “Clean these feet. Dry them. Hold them in your hands. Be silent. Pray.” and my black sheet to cover my body.

12:00pm — Surprisingly, I am keeping a very good sense of time and I pretty much know how long I’ve been standing. It helps that a bell is rung every thirty minutes. Nobody’s washed my feet yet. I’m just standing there entertained at the way people are reacting to us being there. One lady walks by and spews, “IN THE NAME OF JESUS!” Mothers clutch their children and one girl says,

“I would wash this girl’s feet but she might kick me and if she kick me I’mma be sad.”

12:30pm — Now it’s getting hard, mainly because of the heat. Four people washed my feet, one guy tenderly washed the cuts on my foot from an unfortunate kitchen-cleaning incident where I dropped a jar of honey on my foot. Nothing weird (not weirder than me standing in Union Square asking people to wash my feet I suppose). A shit-load of skateboarders blocked traffic for like twenty minutes. That was cool. It’s hot. I can hardly breathe. I’m starting to sway. Where’s that bell? Come on 1:00pm!

12:50pm — Time to go before I pass out. I kneel down, breathe, slowly gather my belongings and calmy walk back to Au Bon Pain and chug an entire bottle of cranberry juice.

4:00pm — I return with the intention on standing for another hour, but I decided I don’t like passing out in public as performance so I declined. The press came and documented the event. the highlight was watching Rob and his son wash someone’s feet. Yeah, germs and that’s gross and blah, blah — but it was beautiful to see them very respectfully and carefully washing feet.

Lawrence Graham-Brown / Gimme Bak Ma Clothes!

We were also joined by another AIOP festival artist, Lawrence Graham-Brown, who’s semi-nude black male body provoked a different kind of fear. The kind that had a policeman there in less than ten minutes.

Guess that’s all there is to say about that.

So I’ve been doing a lot of writing. Mostly short narratives that may or may not relate to each other, my goal has been to capture pockets of everyday experiences without forcing a grand narrative structure. Most of the stories are “true,” to my memory at least — but I also play with blurring the lines of fantasy and fiction, which our memories do from time to time anyway.

If you like it, tell me, if you hate it, keep that shit to yourself.

Seriously, I’d like feedback if you have any. Here are my first two micro-plays. Enjoy.

-Shelah

Lamb Chops

http://vimeo.com/24326320

OK, I’m slakcin’ on my pimpin. Here’s a quick update for the past few weeks.

Last time we spoke I was in the midst of some serious momentum. HOLLER! Let’s recap.

1. Applications.

I applied for this and got it! We are in the fourth week of work-shopping now and it’s great. For the past three weeks, a group of about 17 artists/activists meet every Saturday morning to explore our own artistic/political endeavors as well as collective ones. Led by George Emilio Sánchez, we’ve been mainly engaging with Boalian activities(Sanchez worked with Augusto Boal for years) and getting to know each other.

We traced the shape of our bodies, then filled the frame with things that have "shaped" our lives.

For the final show at LaMaMa in June, I plan on doing a tiny, re-performance in the spirit of Be Black Baby. STOKED. I want to develop this piece in to a larger, more elaborate environmental theater piece over the next two years in NYC.

Also, I am applying for my first real people job today. Yay. The position was gently placed into my universe by God. I know it.

2. Theater work with youth.

I’ve blogged several times about my interest in using theatrical techniques in my work with with children that doesn’t facilitate bruised egos, stardom and produce anxiety riddled situations where you are yelling at a five-year old,

WHY DON”T YOU REMEMBER YOUR LINE?? IT’S ‘MOO’! THAT’S IT. ‘MOO’?!

Not up my alley at all.

The research for my thesis culminated in a 30-page essay detailing the process, the content and the implementation of a five-week workshop with about thirteen homeless Brooklyn-based youth. The focus of the workshop was how to use hybrid theatrical techniques and play as a way to deconstruct racialized narratives. I cannot show the student’s faces or reveal their names, but I have a short clip of some of the amazing material they created in the workshop.

http://vimeo.com/23437127

Basically doing very serious self-reflexive work by playing. Yay! Through the research to create the workshop, I ran into this agency, and participated in a short residency with them. Here’s a peak into the process.

http://www.vimeo.com/23312179

3. Graduation

Oh yeah, I’m graduating from Tisch next week!

Here's to the future: my first creative dramatics program I lead in Hohenfels, Germany. Four kids. A life-changing experience. (2008) This photo reminds me of the transformative power of creative expression.

Disclaimer: I’m usually not this corny. I promise.

What I’ve done since last week Sunday 7pm…

• Answered a variation of the questions from Pamela Slim’s blog about entrepreneurship and self-employment. Someone graciously helped me out a whole bunch with this part.

What’s my ideal life?

• My ideal life is a peculiar combination of artistic notoriety and the freedom of being a nobody.

Where do I want to live?

• For now, I’d like to live in a brownstone apartment that has a small garden and where I have my own bedroom/bathroom.
• I have two roommates who are warm, caring, clean and creative. I feel comfortable with them.
• My house is cozy without being cramped and I can commute to the city in 30 minutes.
• I live within 3 blocks of the subway.
• My rent is under $900 per month.

What does my work life look like?

• I work 3-5 hours per week from home creating lesson plans and preparations for my clients and directing projects. I work in a quiet place, usually alone and in front of a computer or notepad.
• I work 15 hours per week coaching private or group clients in creative dramatics at a rehearsal space or their homes.
• I work 20 hours per week directing or performing in creative works (on stage, film and other various mediums). For my directing projects, I work experimentally with a solid group of performers who trust me and each other.
• Once or twice I year I travel domestically or abroad to perform in festivals or workshops. Sometimes I bring my family along, other times I go alone.
• I perform ongoing research on various experimental, socially-inclined performances.

My home life?

• I am in a committed partnership with a loving, caring man.
• We have children (no more than three, or God help me).
• I take my children to creative courses twice a week.
• Sometimes I pick my children up in the middle of the day and take them to the beach (which is not more than 35 minutes from my house).
• My children are in an alternative, non-traditional school setting where they are valued, challenged and nurtured.
• In a “normal” day  my children go to school at around 8am. After that, I do some planning or other preparation until I have to meet with clients. At around 3pm, me (or my spouse) picks the child(ren) up from school. If I have rehearsal, I spend time with them doing homework or relaxing until I leave to leave. End of day.

What does my exercise life look like?

• I have a personal trainer that trains me for one hour-long sessions, three times per week.
• I attend one dance/group fitness class per week (apx. 1 hour long).
• I get exercise performing as my work is many times movement-based, physical theater.

What does my financial situation look like?

Disclaimer Part Deux: I know nothing about “normal” people’s finances, and I don’t care. I just dreamed this section up.

• I generally earn $100,000 per year.
• I have a travel fund of $10,000.
• I have $20,000 in my savings account.
• I have $20,000 in my retirement account.

What does my spare time look like?

• In my spare time I do things that make me uncomfortable like the following:
• Nude figure modeling.
• Creating/writing/directing works that will ultimately upsets groups of people.
• Travel to places where nobody knows me.
• In my spare time I will also do things that make me very comfortable like the following:
• Creating/writing/directing works that will ultimately upsets groups of people.
• Creating/writing/directing works that will resonate with and touch people.
• See performances.
• Go to galleries.
• Take my children on adventures.
• Fine dining.
• Shop.
• Go to the nude beach.

What skills need to be acquired or actions made in order to attain the aforementioned lifestyle?

• I need to become more financially literate.
• I need to become more acquainted with running a small business.
• I need to earn at least $1,500 per month to get a new apartment.
• I need to obtain enough clients to coach at least 10 hours per week.
• I need to direct more.
• I need to find a partner that shares my familial values, life view and alternative (is it?) lifestyle. #GoodLuckWithThat (I kid, I kid)
• I need to earn enough money on my own so I never have the pressure to work a “regular” job again.
• I need to flesh out the particular set of dramatic skills or techniques that will become the foundation of my coaching.
• I need to become acquainted with a system to manage personal and business finances.
• I need to hire a personal trainer.
• I need to continue with my current research and artistic experiments.

Questions specifically about my future business:

We made due with absolutely no resources, but the students were amazing nonetheless.

Who is your ideal client?

• My ideal client is the parent of a teen/tween who values the arts and creative expression. They are people who respect an artists work and process. They are caring, involved parents that want to raise well-rounded and dynamic children. They have an open, flexible worldview.

Where should I send people who are interested in learning more about you?

My website/blog.

Who would you really like to meet?

• Nicki Minaj
• Ann Bogart
• Robert Lepage
• Katie Mitchell
• Natalie Portman
• Darren Arnofsky
• Spike Lee
• Ingmar Bergman
• Michael Haneke
• Bill T. Jones
• Pina Bausch
• Marina Abramovich

Which media would you love to cover your business?

• BBC
• IFC
• HBO Documentaries
• OWN

Also…

• I have two meetings with professors this week to discuss recommendation letters for the opportunities (this and this) I mentioned last week.
• I have a meeting to workshop my essays and application materials with a friend (a visiting scholar from Poland). She’s super cool and super smart.

newFangled members

• Had my first rehearsal with experimental performance group newFangled theatReR. Our first rehearsal involved various movement, ensemble exercises and working scenes from Artistic Director Johnmicheal’s original play about the shitty state of the New York public school system.

Until next time…

Gotta love a show (The First 48 ) that has people giving information about crimes/criminals, videotapes them, airs it national television, and throws the people right back into their respective neighborhoods. GOOD LUCK WITH THAT!

But I digress…

Here’s what I’ve done since my last post 48 hours ago.

For Goals #1 and #2:

I started with writing down my skills and things I enjoy doing.

Then I created 3 (instead of 5) options for an idea that could make me $1k/month costing me 15 hours per week. It just so happened that in the process of doing this, GOAL ONE (create an idea that can make me 1k/month on the side) and GOAL TWO (create a drama based program for children, etc) merged together.

So, I got three ideas together and sent them to six (instead of 5) people who’s opinions I really respected.

Here’s what I said:

Here’s what they said:

“I think that these both sound like amazing option, and my question to you is simply this: which one do you think would be easier to market? My gut instinct says that one on one is more valuable and that a group might come eventually, but first people probably want personal attention if they are looking for a coach. And I think you would be wonderful at that. Do you know anyone who has been talking about doing some extra work on process or technique? You’ve also got so many followers on twitter, your website, ect, and now is the time to utilize that social media. I hope this was helpful! Let me know what you decide, or if you want me to elaborate”

“I think you can do a combination of the two, on sessions twice a week you can do individual lessons and once a week you can host the group lesson.  that way your target the wallets of both parents and organizations.  i think you need to let a list or references together as well as a lesson plan and some clips of your past work to use as a selling tool for your potential clients”

“YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAS! I’ve been super-pumped at how serious you’re taking this.”

For Goal #3:

I began application to The 2011 Session at the Mellon School of Theater and Performance Research at Harvard University and EMERGENYC: Hemispheric New York Emerging Performers Program. I took specific action for applying by laying out all necessary application materials and creating a timeline for first and second revisions of each piece of the application. Then, I went into the calendar in my rad phone and set reminders for when each item would be due. I also created dates for meetings with my adviser to review materials. Then, I set reminders for one week before the deadline and another for the final deadlines. Hey, I’m always on my phone so I figure this would be a good way to keep track of everything.

I will update in one week from today and let you know what has happened since then. Until next time…

Before (soaking up the Miami sun)

After spending three weeks in sunny South Florida sunbathing, cooking, eating and watching  The Real Housewives of Atlanta (Phaedra ain’t shit) with my friends, I exited JFK Airport with a nagging sense of dread. I dragged my luggage through the cold, wet subway and over dirty snow-covered streets of Brooklyn back to my pretty, lonely apartment.

Why so sad?

Maybe it was the reminder that at this point I don’t really belong anywhere. I’m too old to be at home, and not really welcome there anyway, and New York isn’t really where I reside either (or not yet at least). Maybe it’s the dull anxiety I feel because I know things at my job are not ideal, having left for vacation directly after a tense, unproductive meeting with my boss.

Maybe. Because my first day back at work I was greeted with a hush as I entered the room, long glances and phony smiles. A new after school schedule had been printed up, but there was no space for “Drama.” Seeing as how I am the only “Drama Specialist” at the site I knew something was up. My boss flashed me a large Cheshire Cat grin and emptily asked me about my break. He didn’t look me in the eye. He rambled on about how he wants to please his employees and do what’s right for the kids, blah, blah, blah…long story short: I was being kicked out. Or, “transferred to a site where I can actually do what I’ve been hired to do.” The speech was presented at first as if I had a choice, but when I asked about staying, I was told that everything had “already been set up.” Yeah, sure.

I will refrain from saying anything else at this point because I still currently work for Harlem Children’s Zone, and I am going to just hope for something better at this new site.

After (the view outside my window) —->

What I’m gonna do about it…

In all my self-pity a friend of mine re-introduced me to the blog called, “I Will Teach You To Be Rich.” Okay, the name does sound like your run-of-the-mill self-help financial BS, but what I will mention below struck a cord with me – so whatevs.

Ramit Sethi, the author, blogged about our hidden assumptions that keep us from really reaching our fullest potential, and how those assumptions are usually wrong. I won’t re-write the post but I decided to accept the challenge. I am going to publish three goals along with the assumptions that prevent me from reaching these goals. In 48 hours, I will report back on what I did in 24 hours and what happened those following 24 hours. The 48 hours started Friday night at 7pm, so my next post about the case study results will be around Sunday at 7pm.

Usually I would think this shit is cheesy as hell, but at this point I have nothing to lose. I’m already a nerd, I’ve already risked everything to be here I’m already broke, you get the picture.

Here goes…

GOAL #1: Generate $1,000/month of income from work on the side that costs me 15 hours per week.

ASSUMPTION: I do not have enough knowledge or skills to implement something that can create steady revenue. I wouldn’t know where to start.

GOAL #2: Create a set of skills or techniques that are uniquely mine to form a theory of creative dramatics for children.

ASSUMPTION: I do not have enough experience for parents to trust their children to me as a private coach. I need the backing of a major institution to do this. I am too young and do not have enough experience in “the business” in order to coach children.

GOAL #3: Find at least two paid (or otherwise worthwhile) acting gigs per month.

ASSUMPTION: I don’t have updated headshots, or enough NYC acting credits to be taken seriously. Also, finding/securing gigs in New York is too hard and I won’t book anything.

What will I do in the next 24 hours?

ACTIONS FOR GOAL #1. I will list all the skills that I have. I will list all the things I enjoy doing. From this, I will locate areas where people find value in skills I already have and things I already enjoy doing. After this, I create 5 options for an idea that I could market to create revenue around the qualities I have previously identified. After this, I will send the 5 rough ideas to 5 people whose opinion I respect and value.

ACTIONS FOR GOAL #2. I will look over my previous work experience and old curriculum guides. I will highlight recurring themes or ideas. I will identify a unique name for my set of ideas based of the themes already present. I will then find how these ideas can be built on to be more effective. I will create a concise email marketing myself as a private drama coach to 5 parents/educators I trust and know.

ACTIONS FOR GOAL #3. I will begin applications for two artist workshops that I have been to scared to apply for. I will find one audition to attend this upcoming week.